First Light
Did you know there is a time of day called first light and last light? They’re approximately twenty minutes before sunrise and after sunset. I look forward each new day to first light – it seems calm, quiet, slow. (I know, I know there are many up and commuting by then.) But for me it beckons ‘come out, look up, breathe deep’.
In a matter of days, we celebrate the greatest miracle and gift ever – the resurrection of Jesus Christ, known to most as Easter. Many will barely reference Jesus on this monumental occasion. The true Joy will get lost in egg hunts and family dinners for many.
My mind drifts to thoughts of the first Sunday after Messiah died. It was early, perhaps first light, three women hurried to the tomb of Jesus – carrying spices to anoint His body. They were wondering how they were going to roll away the large stone. As they arrived, they noticed it was already moved aside.
What must it have been like finding their way in the pre-dawn minutes, distraught over the events of His death, wanting to honor their Lord one last time? This was no celebration, no expectation of goodies in eggs or fun events for the family. This was a heart wrenching procession.
Much like it would be for us when we awaken the day after a loved one has passed away. We would make our way in numbness, swollen eyes, and longing for it to be a bad dream.
Just when it seemed all was lost – they arrive at a tomb where Jesus is no longer laying. An angelic messenger greets them: “He is not here; He has risen, just as He said.” (Mattew 28:6a NIV) It had been too hard to grasp – to comprehend that Jesus would die and would then rise on the third day. All that’s in their thoughts right now is the horrible suffering of Christ on the cross, the agony and weeping as they watched.
The angel told them to hurry back and tell His disciples the great news. After the women told them, Peter and John took off running. When they discovered He truly was gone, they returned even more distraught. But Mary Magdalene lingered and asked the gardener if he knew where Jesus’ body could be? And then…He spoke her name, this was no gardener, it was true, He was alive!
First light took on a whole new meaning at the empty tomb. First Light was the Light of the world. From that day until now all people have the opportunity to enter an everlasting light where no dark death will ever reside and where each new day adds up to an uncountable number “For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life.” (John 3:16 NIV) Each day first light is a reminder He is Risen!
No matter what?
Sunday morning the pastor had chosen a passage that seemed like an unlikely way to illustrate a point. As he progressed, he showed us how all of God’s Word is relevant at all times and is food for our souls. The topic was based on a question his young son had asked him: Will God really love us forever? (No matter what?)
The pastor’s third point hit home. He was speaking of three misconceptions we have of God. The third one being: God’s love means He will never discipline us or allow pain into our lives. This is a misconception that I was lost in for about a year. I was in a great deal of physical pain, leading to emotional pain, and I was spiraling down.
In fact, I said on several occasions “I would never allow my daughter to suffer like this; and I’m His daughter.” And then I let in the lie that satan loves to hang over our heads: it must be my fault, I’m not good enough, not worth loving.
What’s strange about that period of time was that I knew my thinking was wrong. I knew the Bible verses that indeed say God disciplines us, we will suffer in this world, etc. Somehow, I believed that none of that pertained to me. And then when it did, I could not fathom the why.
Pain has a way of distorting our emotions, our thoughts, our beliefs, our outlook – and it often interrupts when we least expect it.
The pastor referred to a quote he had read: “Sometimes the most loving thing you can do as a parent is disappoint your child.” If we saved our children from every bad, wrong, hard thing in the world and made sure they never knew disappointment, they would not grow to be men and women. They would linger in immature selfishness. What a rude awakening the world would be.
Since mid-2022 I have grown in ways I didn’t know I needed to grow. These changes would not have happened in any other way. Again, it is proven true, the Lord works all things for the good of those who love Him.
On the other side of struggles and trials we see more clearly. The Holy Spirit has worked change in me. I have eyes that see differently, a more compassionate heart, and a deeper longing for the truths of the Bible. On hard days I still stumble around a bit, wanting the perfection of eternity without experiencing the results of this fallen world.
Don’t let the lies lead you to believe God won’t love you forever. He always has, always will love you. Enough that He will lead you through the valleys and the heights. “And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love.” (Romans 8:38 NLT)
Rest
The river near where we live is the color of iced tea – not because of pollution, because of tannins and a high iron content. As I looked out to the horizon, the water looked bluest blue. But when I looked to where it was inches deep, there was the tea color.
As I walked on, I noticed people are a lot like the appearance of the river. A woman in her walking dress with a husband equally well-clad. First glance says wealthy. A terribly overweight young man on a bench, dismissive thoughts. A four-year-old with her purse on her shoulder and sunglasses skipping along until she rounds the corner and eyes two strangers and scurries back to dad.
All these people are like the river in that when I just look at the surface, I cannot understand the real person. Just under the surface is a life that’s had ups and downs, struggles and rejections, innocence and joy.
What do others see when they look at you, at me? What would we tell them if they really wanted to know us? Not saying we need to ask mere strangers to bare their souls. We rarely do that with those closest to us. But it does remind me that there is One who already knows the below surface me and you. And still loves us.
God created us. His Word reminds us we are fearfully and wonderfully made. This is a mystery to us. We know real us too well. Yet we long to be truly known – and accepted with all the flaws and insecurities – and yes, some uglies too.
Turns out, it was the same for Jesus when He was on earth. “No one knows the Son except the Father, and no one knows the Father except the Son and those to whom the Son chooses to reveal Him.” (Matthew 11:27b BSB) Those who looked at him often saw what He could do for them, or they ridiculed and judged Him, and some saw that deep desire of their soul could be found only in Him.
The next verse is well-loved by many “Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28 BSB) We cannot help but be weary and burdened in this life. “Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” (Matthew 11:29 BSB)
Ah, rest, soul rest. Perhaps on His mind when He spoke of rest was us coming to Him baring our soul. Finally acknowleging the love of a Savior who knows us so well and in whom we can be the real us. “For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.” (Matthew 11:30 BSB) A yoke doesn’t sound easy; a burden doesn’t sound light. But He is not laying more on us. He’s giving us a way to navigate through the burdens we face, to be led by Him – He does the carrying. Thank You, Lord, for seeing us, loving us, guiding us, and being our rest.
So close
A wee hours in the morning storm rumbled in the distance. I lay listening as it grew closer. Soon flashes of lightning lit up the edges of the curtains. Loud booms followed. And then, whoosh, rain pelted the still dark morning. I smiled and snuggled down.
Storms like these are comforting to me. For one who has always been in “control” (or thought I was), the weather was not something I could control. But I knew Who did. Living in the lightening capital of the USA I’ve experienced many thunderstorms. The fresh air that accompanies them, the quiet right after the storm – those are sweet moments and a reminder of our Mighty God.
That morning, after the storm, our walk along the water was still overcast. But as we turned to head back, a break in the clouds with a peak of blue sky and rays of sun casting down to the river lifted my head. A living picture of this verse: “I sought the LORD, and He answered me; He delivered me from all my fears.” (Psalm 34:4 BSB)
My fears have been heightened a bit this past week. My default ‘fix it’ mentality has fought to take over. And I’ve fought to stay close to the Lord. Hard to say which is winning at the moment, depends on the moment 🙂
Further along in Psalm 34 I’ve clung to: “The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” (vs 18 NIV) He knows our hearts, how this sin-stained, broken world at times breaks us.
There will be times in earth life where the crushing seems too much. There will be times in life where pure joy accompanies our days. But there will never be a time in this life that our Jesus is far away. He is with us in all the ups, downs, and middles.
I know all too well that sometimes He seems far away. Like He forgot me. Like I’m lost and I don’t have GPS. We feel this way because we are human – He doesn’t condemn us for our doubts or worrying. But He has fixed it all – past tense. Whatever you’re going through, He’s got a great ending. Sometimes in the here and now and sometimes only when we enter our forever days.
Going back to verse 1 of Psalm 34, I invite you to join me: “I will praise the LORD at all times. I will constantly speak His praises.” (NLT) Always looking not to what we see, but what will eternally be. You were prayed for before you read this. Our Father has prayer warriors covering us that we often never know about. Let’s turn our fears to praise and let Him be so close.
Courage
A pastor and author that I’ve come to dearly love, announced it is time for him to step down from his role. He’s in his 70s and physically things aren’t going well. Tears sprang to my eyes. I’ve learned so much from him. Through the last couple of hard years his love for God and ability to teach the Bible have encouraged me more than he’ll ever know.
Courage is a scary word. To need courage implies that something is frightening or difficult or painful. In your life and mine multiple times we will need courage. Whether it’s when we’re 5 and afraid of bugs or 65 and afraid of losing a loved one – and all the in betweens – to take the next step requires courage.
The world would tell us we must find it in ourselves, or in a bottle, or in money, or in power. As I’ve read the Old Testament, I’ve seen that in Joseph, Moses, Joshua, David, and all the prophets the common thread was where their courage came from. As David faced Goliath he shouted: the battle is the Lord’s! The writers of the New Testament daily faced persecution – and it was ugly. Being flogged, imprisoned, tortured – still they persevered, but not in their strength.
So where does that kind of courage come from? There’s a word I love and daily try to give: encouragement. A little word that sounds like a nice thing to say. But ‘en’ means to put ‘in to’ or ‘on to’. And ‘ment’ means to put into action.
God encourages us through His Word. The Holy Spirit, residing in us, encourages us as He lives in us. And we in turn are to encourage those around us. When I’m at a low point, my friends speak truths to me. My husband assures me. And God tells me over and over He is my strength, my ever-present help in trouble, the One who goes before me – beside me – behind me.
“For everything that was written in the past was written to teach us, so that through endurance and the encouragement of the Scriptures we might have hope.” (Romans 15:4 NIV)
“May our Lord Jesus Christ himself and God our Father, who loved us and by His grace gave us eternal encouragement and good hope, encourage your hearts and strengthen you in every good deed and word.” (2Thessalonians 16-17 NIV)
“Therefore encourage one another and build each other up” (1Thessalonians 5:11 NIV)
Whatever you’re facing today, I want to encourage you: you are dearly loved by your Creator; nothing is too hard for your Heavenly Father; the best is yet to come. For we have an eternal hope not in this world but in the One who helps up defeat lions, walk into promised lands, stand firm in our faith, and reminds us the promise of forever is the courage we need for this moment.
No comparison
Looking up I noticed light creeping through the window edges, the fringes of dawn. As I raised the curtains I smiled at the beginning of a new day. I’m a morning person; I love first light. I’m also a walking, hiking person. Give me a good trail and my cares melt away – at least for a little while.
This morning my husband and I set off on a trail near our home we hadn’t yet discovered. As it opened into a wide vista of pine straw floors and giant trees shading the way, I knew I would want to walk it often. The strong winds rustled the treetops, and as they swayed, they drowned out the sounds of civilization. It was a gift, and I knew who to thank. Jesus is in the details of our lives – and this path, here all this time, was a gift He showed us when we were ready to find it.
When we neared the end, there was a grassy area with boat ramps. Apparently, the far back of a nearby neighborhood. Who knew? Turning back, I thought if this little jewel is near my home, how many amazing places are there on this earth? And I was reminded, I haven’t seen anything yet. Eternity and the trails and hikes of forever I can’t even begin to imagine.
All of us are walking a trail daily. The one from first breath to last sigh. We miss a lot along the way. In our busyness we become focused on the temporary, what is seen. But what if now and then we remembered this verse: “So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.” (2Corinthians 4:18 BSB)
The verses preceding it are our reality: “Therefore we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, yet our inner self is being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory that is far beyond comparison.” (2Corinthians 4:16-17 BSB)
When our world comes crashing around us it’s very easy to lose heart. And as we age, we see our bodies not cooperating with us like they used to. But Paul tells us a truth we can cling to – these earthly woes are temporary, the Holy Spirit is renewing us on the inside, and what awaits us has no comparison.
‘Weight of glory’, I had to look that up to see what was meant: “The ‘weight’ suggests something substantial and valuable, far surpassing the fleeting nature of earthly troubles.” Yes, as much as a beautiful trail can calm a heart, the reminder of what is truly valuable is our assurance at all times.
How long
I’ve been reading through the Bible for…well let’s just say it’s taken more than a year. I turned to a short book in the Old Testament, Habakkuk. I’m trying to be more purposeful with my readings lately. Instead of rushing through and checking the box I decided to ask God to show me what I’m supposed to see as I read and to show me Jesus.
Habakkuk starts off with a question many of us ask or have asked: “How long, O Lord, must I call for help” (vs 2a) The prophet is struck by all the deception, wrong doings, wickedness, brokenness around him. He thinks, as I am prone to do – wouldn’t now be a good time for You to act Lord?
We have lots of ideas for Him: how about bringing a loved one to salvation now? Healing us or a loved one from cancer? Giving a marriage proposal or a pregnancy long waited for? A job or financial turn before everything is lost? Even, can’t Jesus just come back now?
God speaks to Habakkuk and tells him He is indeed going to do things that will amaze him. But the prophet thinks it’s taking an awfully long time and again asks God why He tolerates all these things and basically says ‘I guess I’ll wait and see what God is gonna do’ – sigh.
That’s me. I fuss. I fret. I worry. I sometimes try to help. Then I sigh.
Again, the Lord responds to Habakkuk in great detail. And this time Habakkuk decides to pray instead of question. What a concept, right? A friend reminded me today that we so often just keep going when in a matter of a few minutes we can connect with the Almighty.
God delights in our heartfelt prayers. As Habakkuk prayed, He recalled the awesome deeds of the Lord. He acknowledged there is no other God and no other power greater than God. And then…the calm.
The verses ending this short book come from a heart calmed by a loving Father: “Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls,” (vs17) In other words: though sickness and death still happen, financial ruin still comes, marriages end in divorce, fill in the blank ________. “yet, I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my Savior. The Sovereign Lord is my strength;” (vs18-19a) Habakkuk has found the answer to His first question: How long? As long as it takes and in the blink of an eye – both are the same to the Lord, but He knows which one is best for us and all those we love. Yet, we will rejoice!
(verses from NIV)
Every day, every way
I was starting to read a devotion by one of my favorite authors (Holley Gerth) when she mentioned she felt God ask, ‘Will you let me use you, right here and right now?’ I put the book down and responded in my heart: ‘Every day, in every way’. But will I?
At the time I was reading this, the day didn’t have anything challenging happening. No demands were being made on my time or resources. I was in a content and happy mood. But what about on a day when everything seems to be going wrong? Or a day when I want to run the other direction from current circumstances?
It reminds me of Gideon – at one of his lowest moments God calls him to do something monumental. His reaction is basically ‘Who me? I’m no warrior, I’m the lowest of the low.’ Or Joseph whose been in and out of slavery and prison and now the ruler of Egypt wants him to interpret a dream and then wants him to be second in the command of the kingdom. I have to believe that he probably thought: ‘I’m not so sure I can do this’.
My head knows I’m supposed to say to myself: trust God – it won’t be my strength or wit or power, it will be His. But what I really say in those times is: I can’t. And figuratively stomp my foot (just for emphasis).
What I’ve found is those two words are true. I can’t – but in God’s unfathomable ways, He does it through me. Sometimes it’s a painful process. But all the time, it turns out better than all the ways I could have strategized.
What about you right now at this moment? Has God asked you to do something you would rather not? Or are you facing a crisis that you want to wake up from and find out it’s a bad dream? Or have circumstances built one upon another until you’re frustrated, exhausted, and plain old fearful of what’s next?
I prayed for you before you read this – because I have been there. Tomorrow or this afternoon I will probably be in the midst of something too big for me. Our life in this world is never going to be ‘carefree’. Who came up with that phrase anyway? We have many cares – the free part is when we release them into Jesus’ hands.
“And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” (John 8:32 NLT) – Jesus said that when He was speaking to religious leaders, but His word transcends time and is there for our hearts. The truth is He has all our cares in His capable hands. Best of all the truth is: someday we will be carefree because our life on earth is only the beginning. Truth – God’s truth – is our freedom.
To know
My husband and I spent a week in Northwest Florida. This was my playground as a child. It was very different then – no condos, huge houses, or hotels on the beaches. Just a few motels and little homes here and there. To come here is to sigh deeply and look back over the years.
Life is oh so very short. We no sooner become ‘grown-ups’ than we find ourselves wondering where the decades went. Do you ever wonder things like: did I waste precious time? Was I supposed to do more, be more? Have I made an impact on anyone – one that points them to God?
As I read the New Testament writers, it’s clear their burning desire was to do that very thing. In whatever time God had given them, they wanted to make sure others knew Jesus. We often lose sight of our purpose in our day to day. Like Martha, we busy ourselves and focus on the tasks and not the treasure – Mary’s focus was the treasure.
It’s quiet right now. The porch swing gently sways back and forth. The air is cool, the sun is sinking low. Sometimes I think life is supposed to be more like this. But why should it be? Jesus’ 30+ years were not slow, peaceful. The brief years He ministered were fast paced, noisy, purposeful.
Each day, no matter how peaceful or busy, is a gift that is gone at end of day. How can we reveal the glories of Christ this day?
We don’t all have some big grand purpose on this earth. God chooses who comes to world renown and who seemingly lives in total obscurity. Our purpose is to know Him and to make Him known in whatever way He has gifted us to share Jesus.
A grandson called and asked: “Grammy, what countries are we besides American?” Our highest calling is what God told His people in the Old Testament: “And you shall teach them diligently to your children and speak of them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.” (Deuteronomy 6:7 BSB) “Tell it to your children; let your children tell it to their children, and their children to the next generation.” (Joel 1:3 BSB)
Still, it is not us who moves a soul to God. The Holy Spirit speaks in ways to their hearts we can’t comprehend. It’s not about doing more or being more or wondering what our impact has or will be. It’s about Jesus in us and the light He shines through us. Jesus in us changes hearts for eternity.
All my heart
Last week there were issues beyond my control. And control has always been my go-to. I’m a slow learner, but I have improved. These issues were not life and death. Yet they seemed to loom large. And a verse that has been memorized by so many took over my thoughts.
“Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.” (Proverbs 3:5-6 BSB)
My head wanted to say “But what about this and what about that…” but my heart repeated: Trust in the Lord. So, I decided to take apart these well-loved verses and really look at them.
Trust in God – not in my own abilities. Because, truth be told, how many times have I messed things up.
With all your heart – not with plan B in mind, complete surrender. A divided heart is one devoted to self and to another. God wants it all.
Lean not – I can lean on friends, my hubby, my children. But the only one who can hold me steady indefinitely is my Jesus.
On your own understanding – not what I see and know, because I can’t see or know it all. But God does.
In all your ways acknowledge Him – don’t default to what the world is telling me, or the plumber, or the a/c guy, or the doctor. My Father is in all the details, look to Him no matter how seemingly mundane the issue.
And He will make your paths straight – Google can’t straighten my paths no matter how much I search. My best earthly adviser is only that, an adviser. No one has the power to get me towards the best outcome other than God.
It’s amazing how many times the phrase “all your heart” appears in the Bible. God not only wants, but deserves our full devotion. He gives us our very breath. He brought us to salvation in Christ. And He has made an eternity where joy knows no bounds.
The rest of last week when I would start to question outcomes, I repeated the verse in a personalized way: I will trust in the Lord with all my heart. I will not lean on my own understanding. In all I do I will acknowledge Him. And He will make my paths straight. God’s Word is personal, so make it personal to you.
parisrenae 